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Desert Island Films: Blank Page Beatdown

Desert Island Films

Shah from Blank Page Beatdown has kindly submitted his Desert Island Films. Read on for his choices and reasons, and be sure to check out his site. If you haven’t already, maybe give his Question Time post I used here yesterday on Search Engine Optimization a read too, thanks!

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Desert Island Films is about choosing 8 films you would take if you were going to be stranded on a desert island and explaining your choices. They don’t necessarily have to be your favourites, just 8 films, no more or no less! You are also permitted to take one book and one novelty item which must be inanimate and of no use in escaping the island or allowing communication from outside.

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Desert Island Films: Blank Page Beatdown

First of all, I’d never be stuck in a Desert Island on my own. It just would never happen. I plan ahead, so would foresee all circumstances leading to this and try to avoid it. However, if it does somehow, in some weird crazy ass way happen, my choice of movies would just be as appropriately chosen, to deal with my circumstances.

So below, is my choice for Tyson’s Desert Island Films Project. Keep in mind these are not my favorite movies, but rather movies that would help me deal with being stuck on a Desert Island better. Also, they’re in order of viewing, according to my length of time on the Island and the inevitable deterioration of my mental state.

1. Robinson Crusoe ( 1997 Pierce Brosnan Version. ‘Cuz he’s awesome! )

robinson-crusoe-movie-poster-1997-1020235348

Since there are no “What to do when stuck on a Desert Island: For Dummies” instructional DVD’s, as far as I know, so this would be the closest thing. If I’m gonna’ be stuck on an Island, why not learn from the master on what to do, which fruits are poisonous, how to choose which tribal women to make my own, that sort of thing. Take that Tom Hanks!

2. Hum Saath Saath Hai (1999)

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Initially, when the family and friends will be missed, this Bollywood drama focusing on cheesy family moments and super sweet scenes of relatives’ love will be great to remind me of my own family who will never be seen again. You know what they say: A good cry a day, keeps the talking-to-inanimate-objects away.

3. The Beach (2000)

The-Beach-2000-movie-poster

For days when I’m down on my luck and don’t feel much like moving, the adventures of Leonardo DiCaprio in this Danny Boyle classic about a secret group of people on an island full of Marijuana, will definitely get me going. The raunchy and mysterious escapades in this movie, will give me hope and help me imagine an island paradise, just steps away from where I end my search each day, motivating me to continue searching.

4. The Matrix (1999)

the matrix

For all those eventual suicidal moments when I contemplate my death, this movie will help me to question the true nature of my predicament, and get all deep thought-y. When I’ve maxed out my strength and cannot keep going, a thorough viewing of this story of being trapped in a fake world, will revitalize me enough to try to run up Coconut trees or walk on water. The failure to do so will provide a reminder of my precious mortality and keep the ‘kill myself’ feelings at bay.

5. Sucker Punch (2011)

sucker-punch-affiche_343873_44744

This is pretty obvious no? I assumed we weren’t allowed to choose porn. So to save space, I chose a movie that has all the manly urges satisfied in one easy disc. What better to satisfy my… needs, than hot girls, wielding various weapons of destruction kicking ass and blowing shit up… in slo-mo!? Also, Giant Robots. ‘Nuff said.

6. Lord Of The Flies (1990)

el_senor_de_las_moscas_1990_1

When my loneliness gets the better of me, this movie about a group of rat tag kids stuck on an Island, eventually backstabbing each other… will make me truly appreciate, and be grateful for my Isolation. Not that I’d refuse a comely native maiden that happens to need my assistance when stuck in quicksand whilst her daily stroll. And if not, refer to Choice No. 5.

7. Serenity (2005)

serenity

This has nothing to do with surviving on a desert island, and everything to do with Joss Whedon’s awesome western space opera that is this movie. What? I can still geek out when I’m alone on an Island! Maybe make twig figures of the whole cast and do a FIREFLY Season 2 play every night for the natives. Only trick would be trying to do the lens flares. Hmmm…

8. Titanic (1997)

Titanic-movie-poster

Let’s make one thing clear, I’m not a fan of this movie— he says out loud with gritted teeth. However, assuming my Island predicament is due to being on a ship in the ocean, I could always watch this over hyped and way too melodramatic movie, and be grateful for the fact that… at least I didn’t freeze to death on a plank because of a dumb bitch. Giving me new insight and a fresh perspective on my Island lifestyle.

The book I’d take with me is CAMPING FOR DUMMIES. I think the ‘why’ is pretty self-explanatory no?

camping for dummies

Now to our luxury item. This is a tricky one. But I think, I’m gonna’ go with an iPhone 5. But stripped of its SIM card, or any other communication capabilities, so it allowed within the rules.

iphone5-front-back

However, it would have my (eventually beloved) Siri. Because, let’s face it… we all need someone to talk to. And Siri is the only other option besides a real life human being, until they can come up with those Virtual companion things. I suspect I’ve come off as a creep more so than I intended in this post. Oh well. C’est la vie…

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Thanks again to Shah for taking the time to join the prestigious Head In A Vice castaway list. If you would like to submit your choices and add your name to THIS LIST, please drop me an email to – tysoncarter@hotmail.co.uk

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33 Comments

  1. Great to see ‘Serenity’ make someone’s Desert Island list! Bravo!

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  2. SERENITY!!!

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  3. Nice to see some love for The Beach. I really liked that movie.

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  4. I knew there was somebody out there besides me who liked Sucker Punch. Was to go, Shah!

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    • Are you kidding? I LOVE Sucker Punch. I wish there were more awesome works of cinematic orgasms like this more often. I don’t care what the detractors say, this is fluff entertainment done right!

      I’m gonna go watch it again!

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  5. I’m loving these choices! The Beach and The Matrix. Sucker Punch is bold but I like it!!!

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    • Thanks man. They’re not my all time favs, but suited to being on an Island. On a related note, I hated THE ISLAND.

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  6. Yay for The Matrix! That’s definitely a GREAT one to take for the desert island. Ahah, your reasoning for taking Titanic along is a hoot, but still I wouldn’t take that with me any day, ahah.

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    • Thanks Ruth.

      Think about it. The extended version is also good for those nights where fear of getting mauled by a boar in your sleep keeps you up. Pop TITANIC in and you’ll be fast asleep before Kate Winslet gets painted naked.

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  7. gregory moss

     /  May 29, 2013

    Sucker Punch! – Cool!

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  8. Interesting choices. Even though I’m not a fan of Sucker Punch I can understand your reasoning 😉

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    • Hey Nostra,

      I think every warm blooded, heterosexual male can understand my reasoning behind SUCKER PUNCH. I can understand why you’re not a fan though. I didn’t take it too seriously.

      Thanks for the comment.

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      • With some movies I can do that (not take it seriously), but just didn’t manage to do it with this one.

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  9. Ryan

     /  May 29, 2013

    Robinson Crusoe, definitely. And yay Sucker Punch! I could’ve sworn I was the only person on earth who didn’t actively despise that movie.

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    • Hey Ryan,

      That one was hard. There are so many different ‘stuck on an island’ movies, and so many different versions of those movies. But growing up I used to love Pearce Brosnan’s version.

      Apparently a lot more people liked SUCKER PUNCH than either of us thought, if you go by the comments on this post alone.

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  10. Thanks again for joining in Shah, much appreciated and a nice, diverse list 🙂

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    • Hey Tyson,

      Thanks a lot for allowing me to do this. Love doing stuff for your site. If nothing else, I get to meet cool folks who I can annoy with comments on their sites. 😉

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  11. Reblogged this on Blank Page Beatdown and commented:
    I contribute to Tyson Carter’s Desert Island Films feature over on his site as headinavice.com. Check out what films I’d like to be stranded with and why!

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  12. Abbi

     /  May 30, 2013

    I was clearly not in the target audience for Sucker Punch since I thought the only thing that saved it from being bad enough to be offensive was the soundtrack. Lots of good choices otherwise though,

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    • The target audience for SUCKER PUNCH was anyone with any hint of testosterone. So yea. It was, what Bollywood would refer to as a ‘masala movie’. A crowd pleaser crammed full of fluff elements that satisfy the escapism of the general audience with everything including action, sex, rock music. It’s a compilation of awesome. So it’s understandable why it won’t resonate with everyone.

      Thanks for commenting Abbi…

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  13. Wordschat

     /  May 30, 2013

    Now those are some well thought out choices. I really like the inclusion of Lord of the Flies and The Beach. Till next time I got the conch.

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  14. Robinson Crusoe? The irony 😉

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  1. Curse You, Blank Page! | Missing the Muse

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